The problem is that most men, and I include myself in this, simply cannot concentrate on two things at once.

The headmistress of a school near where I grew up in London announced this week that when women go away, they treat their husbands like children, leaving lists explaining where the fridge is and what the children need for school.

Women who believe this and think that leaving men to-do lists will get them to multitask, don't know the slightest thing about men.

She reckons that if women stopped doing this and treated men like adults, we would manage perfectly well.

Wrong. The problem is that most men, and I include myself in this, simply cannot concentrate on two things at once. Multitasking is for Smart Phones, not human beings.

Many years ago, my wife was cleaning the house with my daughter in one arm, a mob in the other and a phone tucked under her ear. “Hang on,” she said to the caller, before turning to me and saying: “What are you doing next weekend?”

I’m ashamed to admit that I replied rather crossly: “I don’t know. I’m connecting our new wi-fi router.”

But that’s the thing. When I’m connecting things to the wi-fi, I’m connecting things to the wi-fi. This occupies all of my brain capacity and there’s none left over for diary planning or anything else for that matter. My daughter could have run into the kitchen on fire and I’d have said: “Just wait until I’ve entered this code in and then I’ll put you out.”

It’s not just me, either. A friend of mines wife broke her leg recently and he was tasked with doing the school run. He set off happily with the children but moments later came back through the front door saying: “Errr, where do they go to school?”

I can hold important things in my head. Professionally – even though I have one – I don’t really need a diary, as I can remember almost every appointment I have and where each of our teams are cleaning for the next week or so. I can also name the President of France and the name of the last 6 Presidents of the USA and how long they were in office – bear in mind I am British, so that is pretty impressive. I can also list all the teams England beat in the 2003 Rugby World Cup.  But the names of my friends’ children? What I’m doing tomorrow evening? Nope. Not a clue.

I vividly remember the first time I was left alone with my daughter. Precise instructions were left on how I should change her nappy (diaper) but when the time came, it was all too much. So, I took my daughter round to my sister’s and asked her to do it.

It’s the same story with the washing machine. I look at the label in the clothes and at the hieroglyphics on the tub and I just can’t concentrate because my head is full of things I need to do at work.

Which is why I look like Winnie the Pooh every time I wear a sweater that I’ve washed myself.

Then there’s the dishwasher. I have asked maybe a hundred times where the tablet goes, and I’ve stood there forcing myself to listen to the answer.

But it’s no good. After I’m told to open the door, I drift off and start thinking about England lifting the Rugby World Cup in 2003.

Luckily, for me I have a wife who is excellent in this area, so I don’t have to worry about what goes where and what’s past its sell-by date in the fridge.

Her name? No idea, I’m afraid.

But this is where we can help, we have a quite a number of clients, both men and women, who we look after and are in a similar situation. They are just too busy with work and school runs or soccer practice, that they don’t have time to do think about housework.

These are singles or married couples, single parents or retired folk. They end up getting to the point where they don’t want to spend their very limited spare time they have cleaning their homes. They call us instead. They have us go in and clean their apartments, condos or homes. Some have us put their laundry in the machine or load and unload their dishwasher. Most just want a maid service to come in and clean, so they can come home to a lovely clean abode. 

You’ve Got Maids of Thousand Oaks, Malibu & Camarillo covers the whole of the Conejo Valley. We offer a full service weekly, bi-weekly or monthly maid service. We also offer 52 Point Spring Cleans, Move in or Move Out Cleans, Pre-Party or After Party Cleans.

Our Maids are all background checked and drug screened. They all have to pass a comprehensive training program with a 90% pass mark. 

We are licensed, bonded and insured and we offer a 100% Satisfaction Guarantee. 

Call us on 805-917-6243 or call us at thousandoaks@youvegotmaids.com